Being Loyal…Even When It Hurts

Being Loyal…Even When It Hurts
May 27, 2013 Vicki Ohlerking

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I recently had to deal with a situation that required me to make a choice: to remain loyal to those who did not remain loyal to me or to cut my ties and move on? I felt betrayed. I felt confused and scared. But mostly, I felt angry and hurt. Here is the only thing I knew for sure:

God did not leave me nor betray me. He was there. He was holding me and comforting me.

And in His comfort, I was presented with my choice. I wish I could say that I instantly made the right decision; took the “higher” road and that angels came down from Heaven and sang as the birds gathered around me and rainbows sprouted from my toes. However, that was not the reality. It required much soul-searching. And it was painful. I had to let God address my anger and hurt. I had to choose that I would not think like a victim, but like a daughter of the King. I told God one day, “I can forgive. And I can even move on, but I will never move on with that person. That’s it. We’re done. I want the best for them, but I don’t want to be part of it.” God’s answer floored me. “And what if you are what I’ve designed to be the best for them right now?” You’ve got to be kidding me! There is no way God could expect that of me. What He said next has set the tone for every day since.

He asked me was my loyalty about that person, or was it about Him? You see, mercy and loyalty aren’t about the person I give it to, and they aren’t even about me. It’s about God and His vision to save the world. What I had to ask myself was not what was good for me, but what was good for the Kingdom? Proverbs 3:3 says to never let go of loyalty and faithfulness. This doesn’t mean that I am a doormat for people to walk on. Rather, it means that if I remain loyal to the vision of God in my life, He will be faithful to make that vision come to pass. It’s a daily, sometimes hourly, choice to rise above the pain and anger and choose mercy, choose loyalty. Loyalty doesn’t mean that relationships that have been broken are all restored. It simply means that in that relationship, the choices I make are for the best of everyone, not just myself. Boundaries have to be set in place. But Proverbs also promises something very powerful.

When we hold on to loyalty and faithfulness, even when it hurts, He promises that that loyalty will be “like good medicine, healing your wounds and easing your pains.” (Proverbs 3:8) Choose loyalty. Aren’t you glad that Jesus always does?

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