Helping Versus Hindering
Little did you know you were marrying a church planter. Or maybe you did know, but were not entirely sure what that calling entailed. Either way you might have found yourself elbow-deep in building a church from the ground up and trying to do your part- whatever that may be.
We are six months into the life of our second church plant, after having successfully launched a satellite campus of a larger church a few years ago. The first time around, we were newly married and I think I probably caused more headaches than help and had no idea what my role entailed. The second time, however, we had a toddler and a baby on the way during the launch season yet I managed to be a partner in the process. I can’t say I have a magic formula to do it just right, but here are some things I learned along the way.
- His dream must become your dream. For some of you, this is already the case and you feel the call as much as he does, which is a huge blessing! For others, this is “his” dream that you’re supporting. Until you embrace it as your own, you will never be able to love your church plant fully. Through your prayers, trainings, and personal growth, do what you can to make church planting your dream, too!
- Avoid the “us against the world” mentality. Life is super-busy and so is church-planting, so the two schedules don’t always mesh. If you have children, chances are you’re going to be home with them while he’s in important meetings, casting vision and making plans for the future. It gets lonely sometimes, but know that you are just where God needs you to be in these times, even when they’re tough. Focus on the blessing of being home with your kids, even when you feel like you’re missing out on something important.
- The more you help the more he’ll be home. During round one I thought my role was to be at home cooking dinner and keeping the house clean to “support” my husband. All he really wanted was for me to get in the game! Ask what you can do to help to make his load a little lighter. He’ll love that you’re involved and your help will free up some time that you can enjoy together!
- Don’t spend too much time worrying about your identity in the church plant. At first, you will wear many hats and may not get to serve in the role you are passionate about. Keep in mind that this is for a season, and eventually you’ll be drawn to where you best fit to serve.
With anything, there are good days and bad days. As you go to plant your church together, learn to celebrate the good and learn from the bad. Lean on each other, pray together, and embrace this adventure as a couple and launch day will be a sweet reward!
Blog Written by Kim Mauney